What Does Depression Look Like?

The symptoms of depression through photos

A sickly looking thing.
Help (er) is coming
Helper shows up
Helper wants to help
Friends… despite sadness and sickness

Depression causes one to shows symptoms of sickness and lack of clarity of mind. But a Cat such as Helper (aka Tuna) can help a little to ease the sadness….. at least they try.


Watch what hope looks like

Are You Ready to Jump?


Images are my own (please give credit and links if you would like to share them.)

Writing out Depression

Reader Warning: Some may find the following post too depressing to read and therefore may need to (or should) avoid it altogether.


I don’t talk much about my experience with depression or mental illness on this blog which was one purpose I had created it in the first place. I know the details of mental illness can get messy and super depressing so I generally opt to keep them to myself. Today I decided to get real with you again and share (or divulge your attention for a few moments depending how you look at it) and let you in on a little bit of the ongoing fight…er…experience I have with it.

It Begins

For me and probably others, depression can suck so much you could care less about doing much of anything. In the middle of a low, you don’t even want to or sense the need to write a simple blog post about how you feel about depression. And when one is bombarded and filled with such inexplicable sadness, desires for doing much of anything are greatly diminished and sometimes altogether absent. If you hadn’t guessed yet, I am having one of those days.

What it’s not

Contrary to what some may think, this sadness I speak of and experience isn’t the kind of sadness you feel/have after you lose a pet or a loved one or have to go to a funeral, although those are all horrific and deeply depressing experiences and events. However, such types of sorrowful experiences can be related and make the sadness that comes with depression feel all that much worse.

One big difference between depression sadness and depression as a result of a sad event is that the later is expected, explicable and explainable but the former isn’t really. We try to explain the sadness of general depression and I will today but it never really makes a lot sense if you have never personally experienced it. I know that people have never been in the middle of it or aren’t currently in the middle of it if they say to simply snap out of it and here’s why. When I am not in the middle of this inexplicable sadness of depression, I can’t understand why it existed or cannot remember very well what it was like when I was there despite its occurrence only a day earlier! It’s true, a day without or with less depression begins to make me think it would be easy to “snap” out of it too…..that is until I am actually in the middle of it again. Wierd, perhaps. But that’s been my experience.

What it is, and looks like, sort of (based from personal experience)

In my little world, sadness caused by depression can be likened to inexplicable frustrations (sometimes anger) of feeling trapped in a endless cycle of hopelessness wrapped up with a unhealthy lack of ambition, anxiety or fear for doing stuff that truly matters. With this type of depression comes anger, frustration, low to absent ambition and of course sadness. In this state, you don’t want to work, can’t work well, don’t want to do even things you usually find enjoyable, can’t get out of bed, or don’t really care if you do or not (even if you still know you should) and most importantly don’t want to talk to people about God. Contrary to what some might think, during my times of seeming despair, I have found that the intellect doesn’t disappear and I am still quite “aware” of my surroundings and what is happening which can make matters worse. Food is still food, people are still people, the bed is still a bed and I look fine. I can and usually even “pretend” I am feeling fine but God’s knows otherwise. In other words my mind isn’t changing tangle objects into something their not. The problem lies in the level and existence of perpetual sadness and that I know I tend to feel my environment to a fault. A sad news event or knowing about one, will ruin my day. Reflecting on the reality that people are going to hell and I feel unable to do anything about it, ruins my day(s). Being reminded that there are millions of people who support the murder of babies, ruins my day. Knowing millions of babies are being murdered, ruins my day. Seeing the masses fall for the lies and deception that Satan so abundantly spreads in all aspects of our lives, ruins my day(s). Knowing people drink in sin like water ruins my day. Knowing I have the same heart and desires to drink in sin like water is just plain depressing. Knowing I have broken God’s law more times than anyone can count is beyond depressing. Realizing that there are people out there who won’t stand up for God’s laws but would rather break them, ruins my day. Of course it goes deeper than a few cleverly linked adjectives and descriptive examples but that’s a super quick gist of my experience.

Hope and Depression?

Now if you know me from my writings about God, you might be surprised. I of all people should know about hope, right? Yes and no. I know the one who gives it and I know the Author of that hope including the source for peace and joy. Yes, I even said joy. I know and believe there is hope out there because I have a relationship with the hope, peace and joy giver. God gives hope to people when they die when you repent and put your trust in Jesus Christ.
You may have heard or read about God’s message of hope on my website before or somewhere else. In fact, I believe He saves (and is the only Savior) from the wrath to come (God’s judgment for sin/breaking His laws). God also gives joy and peace because I know I won’t be under his judgment come Judgment Day. Currently I can’t see it, feel it, touch it, or taste it but I can read about it in His Word. It’s simple faith in something or rather someone bigger that any of us and His name is Jesus Christ the maker of the universe. And yet, I sit here after knowing and believing that, that in my experience having that hope doesn’t do a lot for healing depression or mental illness when you’re smack in the middle of it. In fact, in the midst of a bout with depression and lack of ambition, there is a present sort of tangible sadness that perpetually exists regardless of one’s beliefs and trust in God. Am I alone in feeling this way? I “hope” not.

I have thought of my experience with mental illness as some kind of battle or fight that I might win tomorrow with God’s help or even healing. I should also note that prayer (and even tears) have been a large part of my life and yet the sadness of depression remains. Some days it doesn’t feel like their is much battling going on at all unless it’s a losing battle and I’m the one on the losing end.

If you have ever dealt with depression issues, know someone who is or not, perhaps you have found this post a little depressing. (pun intended) And I do apologize for that but guess what? Writing about it and sharing it with you sure has made me feel a little bit better today. Yay.

Perhaps you can relate to something I wrote about? Know someone or experience depression/sadness yourself? Feel free to comment below.


Watch what hope looks like


Image source

Getting Started with Painting with Bob Ross (and easing some anxiety and depression in the process)

If you enjoy Bob Ross like I do or are the least bit interested in getting started in painting using the wet on wet technique, check out this special 1 hour episode of the Joy of Painting with Bob Ross.

 

 

Below are links and recommendations to some of the painting products I use which can help you get started using the Wet-on-Wet oil painting technique that Bob Ross used on his show.

Bob Ross Master Kit –  I highly recommend beginning with this kit as it will really help you get your painting going and you will save some money on basic paints, palette knife and brushes.

Complete List of Bob Ross Brushes and Palette Knives

Complete list of Bob Ross oil paint

Complete list of liquid oil mediums for preparing the canvass.   While this is a complete list of Bob Ross available mediums, Bob mainly applied his signature Liquid White or Magic White to the canvas before painting his landscapes.

Bob Ross 2-in 1 Easel (as seen on the Joy of Painting after Season 27) – This easel is a good deal especially when it’s on sale.  (Note: any easel will probably work to get started but I have found not many easels allow edge to edge painting on the canvas as this one does well.  The Bob Ross 2-in-1 Easel also can be used as a table top easel if you want to paint while sitting at a table.)

Canvases 16″ x 20″ – also a good deal at Michaels when they are on sale or using a 50% off coupon  (Note: Bob used 18″ x 24″ canvases on the Joy of Painting but you can use any size you prefer just make sure they come at least double primed which most are.

Odorless paint thinner

Bob Ross beater rack and paint brush thinner screen

Small bucket with a lid (the size of the brush thinner screen)

Also highly recommended: 

Bob Ross large Clear Palette

Baby Wipes at Costco or Dollar tree

Roll of Paper Towels

Larger trash bucket for beater rack

Apron and old pair of clothes you don’t mind getting paint on

some old towels

a place to set your paints and brushes when not using them but within reach while painting

Palette paper or a super cheap palette unless you jump right in and purchase the Bob Ross Palette which I recommend if you want to get serious

 

Although I am still quite new at this painting thing, I would love your questions or comments so feel free to drop me a note.

 

(Note: I do not receive any compensation for sharing these links but they are favorite products of mine to aid in getting you started with painting like Bob Ross. )

 

 

 

 


Jerry’s Artarama

Official Bob Ross Supply Site

Watch Bob Ross on YouTube

TwoInchBrush

 

Watch what hope looks like – FullyFreeFilms

 

Facebook Censors Republican Elizabeth Heng

The advertisement you see above is by Republican Elizabeth Heng and has been blocked by Facebook.  Why? Because censorship of Conservatives, Christians and Republicans is becoming the new norm for Democrats and people who don’t want the masses to know what is true.

Facebook Bias and Censorship

Facebook has been known to favor the left in America.  They are not favorable to Christians or Conservatives in general.  Our worldview, specifically a biblical one, is in direct conflict and opposition with the worldview on the left.

Censorship of Republicans and Christians might be the latest attempt by the left to try to suppress the truth about God or Conservative idealogy but Rush Limbaugh has recently offered to explain conservatism to Mark Zuckerberg. Read it here.


Limbaugh: “Journalists and Scholars” Want Exemption from Facebook Fake News Rules

Limbaugh: Facebook Censors Campaign Video from Brilliant GOP Candidate

National Review: Heng gets Facebook Blocked

Why I left Facebook

Rush Limbaugh Makes Offer to Facebook’s Zuckerberg, Execs

There is hope

Watch it! What Hope Looks Like!

Audacity Movie

180


Las Vegas Shooter Paddock Didn’t Know or Fear God

sign_1-e1491266704672.jpg

 

While America is busy attempting to unravel and mentally sort the tragic and horrific shooting massacre that occurred in Las Vegas over the weekend, one fact remains: The Las Vegas shooter didn’t know God. This fact alone is one many people might rather ignore but its reality is undeniable and deeply important.  This may seem like a trivial matter to some but had this man Stephen Paddock believed in God by trusting in Jesus Christ for his salvation he wouldn’t have committed this heinous crime. This goes for anyone, at anytime.  What do I mean you ask?

 

good_evil

Are we seeking God?

First things first.  When it comes to the most important matter of life, simplicity without compromise is best.

Clearly the world is crumbling and falling apart. People are more and more seeking to break the law and do harm to others.  The Las Vegas shooting demonstrates more of the same.

However, God has spoken a stern warning to all who seek to ignore Him. We have all broken His Law (the Ten Commandments).  As lawbreakers or transgressors of the law we are all slaves of sin (doing evil).  Therefore we are all under a curse.  Sin clouds our minds and blocks our view (or a correct view) of God.  As a result we are self-seeking sin-filled creatures who are at enmity with the God of the universe.  We shoot, murder, lie and cheat.  In the Garden of Eden with Adam and Eve, our relationship with God was broken.

Sin is transgressing or breaking God’s law.


The Test

Here’s our biggest problem.  To enter heaven, God demands holiness, perfection and a sinless life.

Have you sinned?

Broken God’s commands? 

Are you willing to seek God? 

Have you ever lied? (9th commandment)

Stolen? (8th commandment)

  

Do you put God first in your life?  (1st, 2nd commandments)

 

Ever used God’s name as a cuss word to express disgust? (3rd commandment)

Hitler and Mohammed are not hated this much.
 

Lusted? Jesus said lust is the same as adultery of the heart.  (Matthew 5:27-28) (7th commandment)

 

These are just a few of the Ten Commandments. It’s evident we are all guilty of breaking God’s God’s law, the perfect standard for what is right and wrong.  Therefore since God is holy, perfect and He cannot have sin in His presence (Psa. 5:4, Hab. 1:13) we deserve His righteous judgment in Hell.


Only One Way of Escape

Therefore, we need a Savior–a way of escape from His judgment for sin.   (James 2:10) 

Our trying to keep God’s commands to enter Heaven or by doing good deeds is not “good enough” since God as the Judge of Universe and cannot be bribed. Because He’s Judge there is only one way in which God can provide this escape.  He must pay the penalty of our sins Himself.
God has to take our sins away for us to be cleared of wrong doing.
He sent His Son Jesus Christ–God manifest in the flesh–to die on a cross paying the penalty for our breaking His Law (Sin). (Ro. 5:8)
Jesus rose from the dead after three days defeating sin and death (the second death in Hell). (1 Cor. 15:3-4) (Revelation 20:9-15)
When you repent from your sin (turn from it as in changing your mind about committing sin) and trust in Jesus Christ alone to save you from the wrath to come (judgment against sin), you will have eternal life! (John 3:36Titus 3:4-7Ro 6:23)
This is known as becoming born again.
What a great incomprehensible love God has for us when we seek it!  (This is salvation)
“God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”   Romans 5:8

In Summary

 

1. God is holy and perfect

and He cannot have sin in His presence.

 (Psa. 5:4, Hab. 1:13)

 


2. We broke God’s Law  (Sinned against God)

God’s perfect standard, (known as the moral law or the Ten Commandments)

Have you ever lied?

Do you always put God first in your life?

Ever used God’s name as a cuss word to express disgust?

(Hitler and Mohammad are not hated this much.)

Lusted? Jesus said lust is the same as adultery of the heart.  (Matthew 5:27-28)

 

The more detailed test is linked here


3. We deserve God’s Judgment for breaking His Law

because of God’s perfection and holiness we deserve judgment in Hell for breaking His Law. (remember due to God’s holiness and perfection He cannot have sin in his presence)

 


4.  Good Works Are Not Good Enough

Trying to keep God’s commands or doing good things won’t work with God (God is the Judge – He cannot be bribed)

Only God can provide the way of escape (from His Judgment) since He is the Judge.


5.  We need a Savior–a way of escape from God’s judgment for sin.  (Salvation)  (James 2:10)

God the Father sent His Son Jesus Christ—God manifest in the flesh—to die on a cross paying the penalty for our breaking His Law (Sin). (Ro. 5:8)

Jesus rose from the dead after three days defeating sin and death. (1 Cor. 15:3-4)  Therefore the tomb is now empty.

When you repent from your sin (turn from it as in changing your mind about committing sin) and trust in Jesus Christ alone to save you from the wrath to come (God’s judgment against sin), you will have eternal life! (John 3:36Titus 3:4-7Ro 6:23)

This is what it means to have salvation.


Final Thoughts

Just because Mr. Paddock did not have salvation in Jesus Christ and a relationship with Him doesn’t mean it’s too late for us.  We are all given a limited time on this planet.  You may not have tomorrow or another minute to seek out God.

If you would like a more detailed version of what I have posted about salvation please take the good person test.  Right now Bibles are plentiful in the United States.  (They even have them at Dollar stores!)  Please pick up a Bible and start reading in the book of John (or wherever God is leading you to start reading). Just start in His Word.  When you have questions seek out answers but don’t stop looking in God’s Word.

I am not a pastor (or even part of any church leadership) but a guy with struggles, faults and battles with sin who’s only desire is to point people the right way which is to know Jesus Christ.  If I can be of any help don’t hesitate to ask.

 

Thank you for reading this important post.


 


See what hope looks like – FullyFreeFilms.com

Have you seen Audacity movie yet?

What does Hitler and Abortion have in common? Check this out

What on earth is going on? Are the Last Days upon us? Watch this

Minnesota Undercover – A Short Story

What’s an atheist?

Latest on the Shooting in Las Vegas

 


 

image source: top is my own

It’s August 21, 2017: “I don’t believe there is a Solar Eclipse”

backyard_eclipse_2017

“I Don’t Believe It”

I wanted to believe the Solar Eclipse of 2017 was real, but I couldn’t see it. Today August 21, 2017 there is expected to be a total eclipse of the sun by the moon but I’m not sure I believe it.  It’s not that I didn’t want to believe either.  I really wanted to see to the eclipse–I even brought my camera so I could show you. The trouble was that where I live the sky was overcast and the air carried a dull orange tint from nearby wild fires. I trust my eyes and I believe what I see. Perhaps you see what you believe. Yet, I scanned the skies in vain seeing only cloudy skies, fog and orange haze. Unless you count the fog, as far as I’m concerned there wasn’t any solar eclipse.

Do You Seek The Truth?

Of course if I should truly doubt the solar eclipse really happened, I don’t have to go far to find the truth.  In fact, according to eyewitness accounts there actually was a solar eclipse.  I even read about it online and saw some videos of what some eyewitnesses described as an “amazing” event. Some people say it was showing the hand of God. While others were simply awestruck.  Should I believe them? I don’t know these people. How do I know these accounts and videos aren’t fabricated or made up? But I still want to know if it’s all true and there is not a good reason not to believe there was actually a solar eclipse.

Many people don’t believe in the God of the Bible. Most often our preconceived worldviews get in the way of believing in Him.  Yet not like believing or not in the existence of an eclipse, many people hate or distrust the God of the Bible. Many of us by nature don’t want to hear what His word says about us.  Maybe you have been hurt by someone who claims to know God or know someone who has been. Perhaps there is great pain or trail in your life that hinders you from believing God.  I have battled things like cancer and depression and know about that kind of pain. Yet none of these things disprove that God is real. In fact it’s just the opposite.

Eyewitness Accounts

There are hundreds of eyewitness accounts and testimonies of the reality of God and who He is.  There are eyewitness accounts of Jesus and who He claims to be. Perhaps you have heard or know someone who has said they would believe in God of the Bible if He would only show Himself to them. The solar Eclipse did not show itself to me. Why should I still believe it was real?  I even went looking for it outside and did not see it with my eyes because there were clouds in the way.  Yet, does that mean it didn’t exist? Of course not. However I have a choice to make. I can choose to believe whether the eyewitness accounts of the actual event are true or not. Similarly, God has revealed Himself to us in His Word. Jesus Himself  has made claims about who He is and any person can freely examine these things to see if they are so. God will not hinder any person from seeking Him, if and when they choose to do so.

I suspect rather, any person who doesn’t believe in God is being hindered by their own selfish desires and lusts.  Simply put, they don’t to find God or God to find them. Sort’ve like a thief doesn’t want to find a police officer. That had been true for me in my life.

“Seek ye the LORD while he may be found, call ye upon him while he is near.” Isaiah 55:6

“The Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost.”  Luke 19:10

“Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.” Hebrews 11:6

Are You Seeking God?

You know this, the world is crumbling and falling apart. People more and more seek to break the law and do harm to others.  However, God has spoken a stern warning to all who seek to ignore Him. We have all broken His Law (the Ten Commandments).  As lawbreakers or transgressors of the law we are all slaves of sin (doing evil).  Like the clouds blocking my view of the eclipse, sin blocks our view (or a correct view) of God.  As a result we are self-seeking sin-filled creatures who are at enmity with the God of the universe.

Here’s our biggest problem.  To enter heaven, God demands holiness, perfection and a sinless life.

Have you sinned? Broken God’s commands?  Are you willing to seek God?  To get started, try this quick test.

Have you ever lied? (9th commandment)
Stolen? (8th commandment)
  
Do you put God first in your life?  (1st, 2nd commandments)
 
Ever used God’s name as a cuss word to express disgust? (3rd commandment)
Hitler and Mohammed are not hated this much.
 
Lusted? Jesus said lust is the same as adultery of the heart.  (Matthew 5:27-28) (7th commandment)

 

These are just a few of the Ten Commandments. We are all guilty of breaking God’s perfect standard. But since God is holy, perfect and He cannot have sin in His presence (Psa. 5:4, Hab. 1:13) we deserve His righteous judgment in Hell.

One Way of Escape

Therefore, we need a Savior–a way of escape from His judgment for sin.   (James 2:10) 

Our trying to keep God’s commands to enter Heaven or by doing good deeds is not “good enough” since God as the Judge of Universe cannot be bribed. Because He’s Judge there is only one way in which God can provide this escape.  He must pay the penalty of our sins Himself.
 
He sent His Son Jesus Christ–God manifest in the flesh–to die on a cross paying the penalty for our breaking His Law (Sin). (Ro. 5:8)
Jesus rose from the dead after three days defeating sin and death (the second death in Hell). (1 Cor. 15:3-4) (Revelation 20:9-15)
When you repent from your sin (turn from it as in changing your mind about committing sin) and trust in Jesus Christ alone to save you from the wrath to come (judgment against sin), you will have eternal life! (John 3:36Titus 3:4-7Ro 6:23)
This is known as becoming born again.
What a great incomprehensible love God has for us when we seek it!
“God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”   Romans 5:8


image is my own

 

Why I Left Facebook

facebook-257829_1280

Facebook Routine

For many people in life, connecting to people is essential to their well-being and Facebook is a big part of that sense of well-being.  Facebook is a routine like brushing ones teeth on a daily basis.  For me it was no different. A year ago I was so close to my Facebook and friends from other places (many of whom I did not know or know very well) that it began to become a problem.  You ask how so? How could connecting with a friend be a problem?  And to answer that question we must know why I left Facebook.

How do you compare?

As most people who use Facebook already know, the application lets the user “share” pictures, videos, ideas, projects, opinions and basically their life (if they so choose) with anyone else who is allowed to become a “friend”.  (Anyone can become a friend which I also find kind of ironic because if you have never met someone in real life or even know them, how are they really a friend?)

Now I used Facebook in all the many popular ways of sharing this and that but the trouble started when I began to compare my life with other people’s lives.  In an attempt to minimize some comparing however, I would avoid viewing the “news” feeds from some people while viewing only the ones I cared about.  But in the end I was still feeling dissatisfied.  For me Facebook was like that. Using Facebook was an exercise in dissatisfaction because other people where doing things and making things go and enjoying life while I was just……there I go comparing again. And Facebook made it easy. Facebook not only made it easy to compare but it also made it feel okay.  Now as a Christian I should know better.

Facebook Bias and Censorship

Facebook has been known to favor the left in America.  They are not favorable to Christians or Conservatives either.  Their philosophy simply rubs me the wrong way and besides it’s wrong.  It’s just another reason I don’t want to use Facebook.  In fact, Rush Limbaugh has recently offered to explain conservatism to Mark Zuckerberg. Read it here.

 

Censorship of Republicans

Censorship of Republicans is becoming normal for Facebook.  On YouTube PragerU has already been censored for educating people on realities and basic truths of life.  But recently Facebook took aim at Republican Elizabeth Heng. See for yourself how Facebook seeks to suppress certain information while it promotes sinful lifestyles and God haters on the left.  And then there’s the request for exemptions by big media.

 

Gossip

Did I mention the gossip aspect of Facebook?  In my opinion Facebook is a breeding ground for gossip whether it’s about truth or lies, gossip is everywhere on Facebook.  Since each user of Facebook is at liberty to post nearly anything that comes to mind, it’s anyone’s guess what might be said.  And when whatever it may be (good or bad) is said and is posted publicly, potentially hundreds of people (and probably more) have instantaneous knowledge of those intricate details. This information can be anything, whether it’s personal, funny, disgusting or sensitive, it’s all apparently fair game on Facebook.  And whatever it maybe that’s said or posted, everyone who’s a friend of a friend of a friend (of a friend) now knows.  I think you get my point. Sometimes this knowledge is helpful while other times it may do more damage than help.  And so my belief has been that if a person is not able to face the person and say it, then it probably shouldn’t be said on Facebook, especially if it’s not private.  And let us not neglect to mention what people post about themselves.  On Facebook it would seem just about anything goes and we all their to see it (or read it).  And so to avoid being caught up in any Facebook frenzies over words and pictures, I decided it was best for me to leave Facebook–before I said something publicly I might regret.  (That is why I post it on a blog……heh heh)

Addiction

Of course Facebook doesn’t have to be all about comparing ones life with another or sharing our lives publicly but I have since learned there is also an addiction aspect.  Personally I did not like the feeling I having each day that I must know what others are doing, saying, posting or thinking at any given moment and that they would gladly share it with everyone!  Pieces of their lives (and my own) were showing up in the “news” feed 24 hours a day.  It’s true, I am for the most part a private person but with Facebook, I felt the constant urge to tell all those “friends” what I think.  After all, they posted what they posted because they wanted my response, right? Here’s the best part. If your post is cute, disgusting, awesome, stupid or clever enough it might even get a like and a re-post! The cycle of feeling the need to know and feeling the need to share opinions and pictures never ends on Facebook.  And so after one year of feeling stuck inside the Facebook hamster wheel I finally made the plunge to leave Facebook for good (hopefully).

Now I beg someone to hit me over the head with a large brick if I ever join Facebook again. (not really….just use a board)

 

If you enjoyed this post, please like and comment below!  Oh, wait.  This isn’t Facebook but feel free to comment anyways.

 

Next, find out why I left Twitter!

 


Limbaugh: “Journalists and Scholars” Want Exemption from Facebook Fake News Rules

Rush Limbaugh Makes Offer to Facebook’s Zuckerberg, Execs

There is hope

Watch it! What Hope Looks Like!

Audacity Movie

180


 

image source

X people, Employment Killers and Real Hope

I don’t know of any kind of work or place of employment that does not involve more than one person for it to be considered a workplace.   (But if you know of any I would love to hear it)  Whether it be during any stage of the hiring process or involving the exchange of goods or services –more than one person is necessary for the work to work.    This news can become a trouble for any person who really doesn’t enjoy (or has a fear of) working with people.    More specifically–for one who is fearful of the expectations involved in completing a task and doing it correctly for another person.   Of course, there are exceptions to these fears of task completing correctly for others, along with the overall unknowns involved but in general terms, fear of some type is always involved.   On a personal note, I might add the fear involved isn’t the same fear as being scared of a bear.  A better word to describe the fear I mean might be apprehension and many times coupled with inexplicable sadness to a point of immobility.   It is probably true, one might become immobile upon coming across a momma grizzly bear defending her cubs but for me in such a situation the words panic, terror and adrenaline rushes and no time to think come to mind.   And yet fear is the common denominator.   I call these people X people.

Now I believe many people live and even enjoy the challenge (and some don’t even consider it a challenge) of just doing whatever may or not be involved to complete the task(s) or work.   To these people living to exceed the expectations of others is what comes to mind when they wake up in the morning.   These folks (which is a majority I believe) are able to adapt and with relative ease to whatever situation is thrown at them.  Whether it be 4am, 6am, 10pm or later time has little effect on outlook and circumstances.  My wife is one of these people I am speaking of.   I believe people who are able to adapt the quickest and in the most efficient way to any situation usually do the best at whatever they set out to achieve.  I don’t believe it’s the smartest person who succeeds but the person most adaptable and fearless.   Now, if this type of excellence comes naturally for them, fear will rarely play a part in the process–despite what they may claim publicly.   Maybe you are this type of person (we’ll call an A person) and can adapt on a whim.   I am sorry that I cannot relate to you very well but I am excited (although not much excitement) but nevertheless, there is some personal excitement for your success.  Yea!

But what happens when you are not the A type person?   What happens when you are an X type person?  Let’s take a closer look at what I think a person X looks like.

We have already discussed fear as it relates to work and the X person.  And you probably have guessed or already know I consider myself to be fitting like a glove into the X category.  This has been the case for sometime now–from birth actually.  But unfortunately, what this really means is that us X people are not really enjoying living our life and forget about living it to it’s fullest potential.   On this earth, we just exist and live to survive and eat to survive etc but not much else really happens (as it appears).  Sure things happen to us, like they do with everyone else.   The weather changes around us,  the rain or snow falls and we get cancer or have kids, get married and don’t get married but whether it be the good, the bad or the ugly, what we do with circumstances and how we perform service for others is quite the trouble.

First, as I alluded to already, our service for and to others is virtually non-existent.  And positive circumstances are hard to come by even if none of what I’m talking about compares to being locked up and tortured for one’s faith.  This is happening more and more.   Of course for me,  there are days and hours when fear and apprehensions are lower.  And during these up times service for others appears more achievable and general circumstances are also interpreted in a more positive light regardless of the situation.   However, the reliability for predicting when this might take place in any given day is almost non-existent.  Perhaps better fitting descriptions for what I am describing are social anxiety and depression.   You may have heard about these little nuggets of crap.  Whatever your thoughts are about the terms, these two experiences coupled together with fear can be a real killer to just about anything faced in life.

Is there hope?  I hear there is but I don’t believe medication is usually the answer and at many times I have seen it make problems worse.  For me,  the underlining trouble with medication is that it treats symptoms and does not fix what is broken.   Real hope only comes from one place and His name is Jesus.  So you don’t get the wrong idea,  Jesus won’t make your life free from problems.  Perhaps just the opposite will occur as is the case for many followers who right now are being physically and mentally tortured for their faith.   But the only real hope and the one that really matters is, is your relationship with God and what you decide about Jesus Christ who is God Son–God manifest in the flesh.  If there is an afterlife,  where is it that you and I will end up after we die?  If you haven’t already,  I “hope” you will take the good person test linked at my website www.AreYouGood.us before you run out of time.

LORD, make me to know my end, And what is the measure of my days, That I may know how frail I am.
Indeed, You have made my days as hand breadths, And my age is as nothing before You; Certainly every man at his best state is but vapor. Selah
Surely every man walks about like a shadow; Surely they busy themselves in vain; He heaps up riches, And does not know who will gather them.
“And now, Lord, what do I wait for? My hope is in You.

Psalm 39:4-7

Related interest:  AreYouGood.us

Why are you cast down my soul?

Today I woke up like most days, but today is a day of deeper inexplicable sadness.  It seems like God is gone right now.  I have been crying out unto Him because I know the Bible speaks of Him watching me and caring for me (He sees and knows everything) but today doesn’t seem like that.   Yes, my soul is cast down.  Pray for me.
Related interest: Psalm 43:5